Cameron Awkward-Rich
Inner Life

Say that you arrive at a clearing—

 

Say that, this time, the clearing is not a field

alight—

 

Say that the clearing is not a brightness
         in the heart of the otherwise
         dark wood—

 

Say that copper beach, that calla lily,

         that hollyhock, that viola,
         that mangave, that queen
         of the night —

 

Say that without turning you turn
         to face it, the light-torn image
         of your life—

 

Say that you enter, dark as you are

when you were young and then
when you were no longer young­—

 

Say that you were not lost, the clearing being continuous

with what it opens—

 

Say that you are standing now in its center, in you
         there is a music rising you can’t
         quite hear, the little hairs of your arms
         dancing in their private weather—

 

Say that the velvet night, the moonless sight—

 

(night embers, crape myrtle,
         geranium, black coral bells)

 

Say that it seems to extend indefinitely
         in all directions, to sprawl
         across the tenses, what was, will be,
         would have been
though
         when you move, it moves with
         and not around you. So here
         you are—

 

 

Say that the question is not, in the end,

         whether you deserve it—


         (what else, what else)

 

Say that you carry it—

 

Say that you carry it, finally,

past the end of what you know
         you are when you arrive—

 

(dark wind, nightshade, lion’s eye)  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Found In Volume 54, No. 03
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Cameron Awkward-Rich
About the Author

Cameron Awkward-Rich is the author of two  collections  of poetry: Sympathetic Little Monster (Ricochet Editions, 2016) and Dispatch  (Persea Books, 2019). His third collection, An Optimism, is forthcoming in 2025 from Persea Books. His creative work has been supported by fellowships from Cave Canem, The Watering Hole, and the Lannan Foundation.

Presently, he is an associate professor of Women, Gender, Sexuality Studies at the University of Massachusetts Amherst.